Well, it's almost February already – what happened to January? It seems like just yesterday I was talking to J about how rough 2007 was and how we were looking forward to 2008. How naïve I was way back on January 1.
Today I find myself saying, "Man, I can't wait until February because January was really rough – and made 2007 look good." I guess we get to start the year sharpening our skills and learning how to lean on others in times of crisis – a lesson I've always looked forward to learning…or not.
As an addition to the post below, I found a new wrinkle in my journey to find my way – stupid road signs. The latest one has hit loud and clear:
If you think about it, how many times have we heard that in our lives? Time and time again until it is a cliché now – "Stop and smell the roses." I'm sure we all hear it many times, but rarely take time to do what it says. I remember one of the first times I heard this message, it was by one of my favorite people of all times, Ferris Beuller. He said, "Life goes by pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."
A movie I really enjoy – despite constant criticism and berating from friends – is The Peaceful Warrior. In this movie, part of what they talk about is living in the moment – being aware of your surroundings and trying not to miss anything. To be conscious of what is happening around you – not only what is happening to you, but also around you. For me, this movie was a great reminder to actually do this – not just talk about it. It's something I've been trying to do for a while now – and I really do enjoy the effects of it.
It seems as though I am usually so worried about what comes next in my day that I can rarely focus on what I am currently doing. If I continue to do so, life turns out to never be enjoyable because there will always be something coming on the horizon. I don't want to get to the end of the road, look back and not remember any of the journey – what a waste that would be.
Instead, I'm focusing on living in the moment when I can, paying attention to the little things in life, noticing the details as much as I can while life rolls by. I find there are many times I have to force myself to do that, but am always grateful later that I did. I don't want to take anything for granted anymore – because when it is gone, I don't want to regret missing anything.
The last few weeks have been some of the hardest in my life (being an adult stinks), but looking back, there have been some good times that somehow found their way into the madness. Being able to enjoy those times helped get me through. I'm sure everyone in my house would say the same thing –there have been times and people that have helped us maintain some level of sanity through it all. Just last night we were in Tay's room and something happened and all three of us (J, Tay and I) started laughing so hard – it was a great distraction to real life and really brightened the evening.
As a quick disclaimer – I'm not saying we shouldn't plan ahead or look to the future – I believe those are extremely important things. I'm simply saying that we shouldn't look to those at the expense of missing out on what we are currently doing. There are times we can be content in where we are and what we are doing if we only take time to slow down and pay attention.
It seems as though I never get the signs I'm looking for though - signs like these:
Dead End, Exit Here, Do Not Enter. Those would make this journey so much easier – either that or autopilot, "Here God, take the wheel and wake me up when we get there." As I'm sure we can all attest, this is not the way it works – our life signs are rarely that clear or obvious. That is why I take it all the more serious when I do get a sign I can read that is clear…so I guess it's time to slow down just a bit…
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